Did my time pass?
Recently I was told that I should just accept the fact that I will be single for the rest of my life. That my time to be married and build a life with that someone was when I was younger, say 20 years ago. I'll be 48 in two weeks just to put this in perspective. I was told that at my age, I have too much baggage and no man would want me. I have health issues and no man would want that. When I was told this, which wasn't the first time mind you, I was already having an emotional day; couple of days really. That was the last thing I needed to hear from anyone.
I was married. Twice as a matter of fact. In my 20s. Neither lasted the first because I was too young and the second because he was inappropriate with a minor. So yes, I have baggage. But guess what! We all have baggage at this age. What hurts the most is not the words said to me. It's who they came from. Someone who says they are Christian, yet says that maybe God doesn't want me to be married.
When every fiber of my being is crying out to God for my husband.
I have always felt that I am supposed to be a wife. I wanted to be a mother, but at my age...who knows if that can really happen but God. I just pray that one day I will meet the man I am to marry and spend my life with. I trust God has a plan for me. I pray it is His will for me to be a wife because this feeling I've had is deep and strong.
It's almost a yearning.
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That being said, I've heard that when you clutch on to something, anything, your higher power cannot fulfill what you need to have because you cannot fill a clenched fist. Let go of what you feel you need...open your hand in surrender and allow them to fill your life.
Mind you, I'm not saying let go of your dream...let go and let God. Allow what He sees for you. Hugs!