Life With Jules, and other stuff

It seems I fight a constant battle in my mind. I don't want to fight this battle but I do. I know it's spiritual warfare.  It sucks!!  

Right now, and really for the past several weeks, our country has been on a slippery slope. This pandemic required us to go into a lockdown mode restricting us pretty much to our homes. Many businesses closed, some permanently at this point. Restaurants went to drive-up or curbside only; some even started offering delivery.  But this is America! We have basic feeedoms guaranteed to us in our Constitution. Herein lies the slippery slope. Our President made a decision early-on to restrict travel abroad to limit the spread. He discussed with the state governors how they will proceed in stopping the spread in their states (Amendment 10). He put together a task force to follow the spread closely and keep us informed; a couple of those individuals do not have our best interests in mind, but I leave that to you to decide. State governors are now exercising their authority in slowly opening up their state and therefore economies. Well, there are a few who are being rather harsh...

Let's start with the cleaning house bit. No, not my actual house. I recently went through the blogs that I follow list and removed several from my list. Mainly due to inactivity for more than a year. While doing this, I noticed several are no longer available and/or have no way to "Unfollow." I wonder how I can remove those from my list? Life goes on, I suppose... I have done a bit more stitching on Praying Hands in recent weeks and have meant to share a post before now. I'm hoping to pick up my stitching again in coming weeks. For now, I am taking things slow as I continue to deal with some health issues. Have a few more tests to do and then I'm sure there will be consults. Possibly surgery. But all I can do is put my faith in God's plan for me.

Today is a day we celebrate the first harvest in America. A day when Pilgrim and Indian came together to share that first meal. A day when families come together and enjoy food, fun, and laughter. Oh, and football! Today, I wish all of my family, friends, and readers and Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving.

So much is going on in my life right now. If I were to try and blog about it, I'm afraid that the posts would go on forever and be a jumbled mess. For now, I am going to say that I have a much deeper understanding of "battered woman syndrome". I put it in quotes because I'm not sure if I can classify myself as such, but I have been in a somewhat volatile at times relationship for two years, until last week. Unfortunately, I had to call for help for him. I wasn't going to let him die, if indeed that's what he was trying to do. I'm not necessarily afraid of him, when he's sober. He's a lot of fun to be around, half the time. Sometimes he's a bit frustrating. And when he drinks...let's just say alcohol and uncontrolled diabetes DON'T MIX! Now, he's in a safer place where he can't really harm himself, or me for that matter. As for me, I am trying to just pick up the pieces and keep him in my prayers to God. I pray that God gives...

A question was posed to me recently that has been weighing on me a little bit. "Where has that woman gone?" To put it in perspective, I was speaking with a colleague about various things and one of the topics that came up was my life in the Navy. Primarily, the responsibilities I held and who I was in those roles. So he asked me where that person has gone and how do I get her back? The simple answer is "I don't know." You see, when a person lives with depression, in any form, they tend to lose a part of themselves. I have battled this ugly disease for years and years. I have asked myself on numerous occasions "When did I become this person?" in varying forms. I lost a lot of my spirit. A lot of my life, over the years. I sometimes look at pictures of myself and don't recognize the woman in them. It's truly sad! I'm not looking for sympathy or empathy in writing this post. I am simply putting it out there. For the world to see. To read...

In the past week, I have had 2 deaths in my family. This brings the grand total to 3 for the last month. I am through with death! On Easter Sunday, I lost an uncle. He was 75 and it was unexpected. He was planning his wedding for this summer. I found out this morning that a cousin of mine lost her son, tragically, by his own hand. Suicide is so prevalent in the world today. I have been to the brink myself a few times. The last time was in 1998 when I was hospitalized. That and my faith in GOD is what keeps me from going there again. I cannot imagine what his mom (my cousin) is going through right now. I can only keep her in prayer, and the rest of the family. This is a chapter from the Bible that is used quite often at funerals and memorials. It was the very first verse(s) I memorized. I am sharing this rendition of it as it gives insight as to the meaning of each line. Please take a few moments to read it through. I encourage you, if you haven't already, please take tha...

 

This year will be a year of deepening my relationship with Jesus! This morning, we had a wonderful worship service at church with a guest sitting in on the drums. He is 9 years old - and man can he play drums! Unfortunately, the video file size is too big to include on this post. Anyway, this evening, my other half and I sat around the dining room table indulging in a little sparkly. I kept my limit to 2 glasses. While I was hesitant to try it because it's a red, Cold Duck is actually not that bad. Mind you, I don't really drink alcoholic beverages often and when I do it's typically just a glass or 2 of wine. Here's a couple snaps of of the flutes filled. I looked in several stores for flutes with New Year's designs already on them to no avail so I made my own. I used Puffy 3D Glitter Paint. It served it's purpose! Enough about the alcoholic beverage. On to more important things: Jesus! So after I finished my 2nd glass, we continued our discussion on Jesus but d...

Recently, I decided to do Bible roulette. Not the typical way I read the Bible, but I felt the need to just let God guide me this time. Anyway, after saying a prayer I opened my Bible to see what I needed to read that morning. It opened to Proverbs 19:23. "The fear of the Lord leads to life, an he who has it will abide in satisfaction;  He will not be visited with evil." (NKJV) Of course, the version I read was the NIV: "The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble." But after looking at a few translations, I found the NKJV was the one I preferred. I think because of the word "evil" being used. So, I then decided to do a quick word study and looked up the following words: fear, life, satisfaction, abide. Here's what I found: fear (Hebrew = yir'ah) - reverence life (Hebrew = chay) - alive satisfaction this word gave me some difficulty as the Strong's only showed  2 occurrences in the book of Numbers. So I we...

I began reading Exodus again yesterday. Yes, again! I lost my place so I started over. Is that silly or what? Nah!! Anyway, I didn't make it past verse 5 in the first chapter! D'oh!! I couldn't get past the names for some reason. So it made me think "Why are names so important in the Bible anyway?" I began to do a little research on each of the names of Jacob's sons. There was: "Reuben, Simeon, Levi, and Judah; Issachar, Zebulun, Joseph and Benjamin; Dan, Naphtali, Gad, and Asher." (Exodus 1:2-4, NKJV). I looked up the meanings of each name. Reuben = behold, a son Simeon = obedient; listening Levi = attached or pledged Judah = praised Issachar = reward; recompense Zebulun = to honour; to dwell (zaval) or gift; dowry (zeved) Benjamin (hebrew: Binyamin)= "son of the right hand" or "son of the south"           (this one is interesting because he was originally named Ben-oni, which means "son or my             pain") ...

What is the best way to read the Bible? Do you start at Genesis and read through Revelation? Or do you follow a specific plan such as Matthew 24, Daniel and Revelation to understand better End Times? Maybe there's a better way. No matter how you read the Bible, you should do just that: read the Bible. Study the Bible. Learn the origins of words that may have been taken slightly out of context through several translations. Oh, and find the Bible version that best works for you. Personally, I enjoy the New International Version (NIV) and the King James Version (KJV). The KJV because I love the sound of the words in old English. We don't speak with thou's, thy's and thine's anymore, so it can be a bit more challenging at first. Have you ever read Shakespeare? Yeah, it's something like that. I also am prone to read the New King James Version (NKJV). The idea is to find a version that hasn't removed verses because we have to face it, some versions are incomplete....

What things do the angels long to look into according to 1 Peter 1:12b? "Even the angels long to look into these things." There are many things I long to look into. Especially things pertaining to my salvation and eternal home in heaven. I fall short on a daily basis. Something I am all too aware of. Yet no matter how short I fall, Jesus is right there to pick me up. So, I wonder if all of the things I suffer in life are preparing me for that life. It seems like a lot when I am going through the storm, but I have to stop and remember what Jesus did, on that day, on the cross, for me.

I've been on vacation for the past week and it's been somewhat refreshing. Somewhat emotional. My niece graduated high school, magna cum laude, and I couldn't be more proud of her! Michael (the proud papa), Ariel, and me. Now she has a few weeks before she heads off to college. I went to church with one of my aunts on Sunday. I enjoy going with her. Although I do feel like I am at a concert during their worship service, lol. I have been reading I Peter; well my church is doing a series on it this month and I am reading it on my own in addition... The letters are interesting indeed. One thing that struck me in my reading this week is the following verse: "...you also, as living stones, are being built up a spiritual house,  a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices  acceptable to God through Jesus Christ." - 1 Peter 2:5 - I like to think that as I continue to grow I am being built up in Christ. I find that I am able to better speak about the Word, as was ...

I have read through Chapter 3 in the book of Job so far. I am taking part in a Bible Study through Good Morning Girls . If you're not familiar, click on the button to the left or on the link in this post. So, as I said, I have read through chapter 3. Normally when I read Job I just plow right through it. I have read it several times in my life. It is my all time favorite book. This time, however, I am reading it in a different manner. I am taking my time, moving at the pace of the Bible Study, and reflecting on what I read. So far, I feel like I am getting more out of it than I did in previous reads. This book is primarily about suffering and what we do in difficult times. Namely, how we handle the storms in life. I know I need a lot of work in this area. I think that's why Job appeals to me so much: I can relate. I just wish I would allow these teachings to sink in; like the phrase "Storms in life" referring to Peter walking on water and keeping his eyes on Jesus. On...

Well, the year is coming to a close and I really haven't done much on this blog. I feel somewhat ashamed of that, but I must press forward. 2015 began on a sour note for me, personally. Spiritually, I have found that I am taking baby steps, STILL . When will I finally have total discipline to my walk with Christ? I ask for guidance, His plan for my life, on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes I feel like He's there, and others not so much. I know that I have made mistakes this year; who hasn't. I'd like to think I have learned from some of them anyway. So here I sit with 2016 looming around the corner and the only thing I can say is I'm thankful! Yes, I am thankful for the life I have. I have come a long way over the past 12 months in my mental health. Oh, I still have up's and down's. But I am learning to handle them a little better, S.L.O.W.L.Y . I spent much of the first couple of months hiding from the world. I would go to my appointments, work, church, et...

I am trying to get myself back into the world of blogging. It helps that a friend of mine is interested in starting her own blog and she's been asking questions. I am so happy to help her in her new adventure! So, now for an update... I have been going to a Discipleship study group at church for several weeks now. We are doing the Navigator 2:7 Series. I am really learning a lot; but not doing nearly enough reading. I know the discipline will come. I need to push myself to actually spend time in the Word. I don't understand why this aspect has been so difficult for me. Anyway, I am working on growing my discipline and relationship with God. It's important to me. Christmas is just around the corner and then the New Year. I don't know what 2016 will bring for me. I can only pray that God blesses me and my BF and helps us to continue to grow in our relationship with Him and one another. It's been a long and difficult journey together. Enough about that. As for my cross...

…of the brave little donkey? “Once there lived a little donkey whose owner beat him daily. A gentle man named Joseph felt sorry for the donkey and paid a high price for him. Joseph and his pregnant wife, Mary, were kind to the donkey, who felt happy again. Joseph told the donkey he needed his help for a very important journey to a town called Bethlehem. The donkey proudly carried Mary and waited while Joseph tried to find lodging. Upset that there was no room, the little donkey brayed so loudly that the innkeeper sent them to a stable where the woman gave birth to her baby, Jesus, whom the donkey kept warm with his soft breath. A brave little donkey carried Mary and her babe. That night was born our Savior, in a manger now he lay. God bless the little donkey and the journey that he made.” *Taken from http://www.stjames-liberty.org/stjames2/2015-advent-calendar/legend-of-the-christmas-donkey/ ********************************** Here is the true story of the Birth of Jesus (...

I haven’t finished Acts yet and I haven’t started with the Good Morning Girls readings in Proverbs. I am a bad, lazy Christian, lol. I have been keeping up with “A.D. The Bible Continues” on NBC though. I think tonight is the final episode in the series, but not certain. What have I been up to, you may wonder, since I have been neglecting my reading. Well, I was in Denver for a week for another class at NVTI, UC Denver. I had a good time, as I always do out there. Spent much of my free time wishing I didn’t have to leave there but alas my job was waiting. This coming week I am heading out again. This time to visit family and friends for a couple of weeks. It’s a long overdue, much needed vacation. Here are some pictures from my trip west. Denver VIEW SLIDE SHOW ...

…not the redundant life. In church this morning our Pastor made this statement based on the readings. We started a new series simply titled “Go!” As Christians, we are commanded to love one another. We are also commanded to “Go and make disciples” in the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19).